Saturday, 11 August 2012

Stages of Grief

1...ACCEPTANCE: This term is largely metaphysical in nature. It is necessary for us to get beyond this point. We must accept the reality of death and its permanence. Unfortunately the nature of death often makes it difficult to admit that a death has occurred.

2...ANGER and rage in these cases can be directed toward: Other family members, [for not reventing the death], The victim, [for dying]. Doctors, [for not saving the life of the victim]. Law enforcement agencies, [for a variety of reasons such as lack of resolution of a criminal case].

In natural death, anger is not normally so severe. Anger can be because others are not grieving enough or too much, or your loved one for leaving you, and much more.

3...DENIAL: Denial is an escape from reality. However, above all else denial, is an unconscious defense mechanism, characterized by refusal to accept the reality of death.

4...DEPRESSION: Depression is a deep sadness at the loss often accompanied by hopelessness of the occasion. Depression results from an emptiness in your life that can't be filled. Some Depression often requires professional treatment.

5...FEAR: Adolf Hitler once said that "the weapon which most readily conquers reason: terror and violence" and J. A. Fruede said "Fear is the parent of cruelty."

6...GUILT: Many of us that work with victims classify guilt as the "What if's." What if I had taken him camping with me? What if she had not been out after midnight? Guilt wears many hoods. Very few of us escape feelings of guilt. For example, I will worry for the rest of my life whether something I did or didn't do, lead to Katie's death.

7...SHOCK: As it relates to violent or natural death, is a psychological mechanism, a fog, which allows us to function sometimes even efficiently, at a very devastating time in our lives. Much of what happens during this time we will never remember. This fog will protect us for days, weeks and sometimes even months. It is my belief that shock is the ally of the griefstricken. Shock is probably the only factor that prevents the onset of more serious mental problems, later during grieving.

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